22nd May, 2021
Before I start this, I know I think too much, but that's what comes of having too much time on my hands. At least, that's what my son says I have. :-) He is right in a way, but at my stage of life I don't really mind that. All the best philosophers had time to think and to be able to think is quite a luxury. I hate to say this, but not all of us are willing, for what ever reason, to think sometimes, but that's a completely different piece of writing.
It is not so much having too much time, but using that time in a beneficial way, and it's better to have too much time and use it wisely, than not have enough and waste it! There, that's Jackie's saying of the day!
Anyway, I was thinking there are words in the language we use that, when we have to use them, can cause some really strong emotions, whether it be excitement, fear, worry... well, you get my drift. One of these words that I have been thinking about recently is “change”. For a six letter word, change packs a lot of power for most of us at so many different stages of our lives, and how we deal with it can sometimes be easier than other times.
If we were to take a minute right now to think about it, I bet we could all recall a moment that change had an impact on us whether for good or for bad. I can remember starting school, going to secondary school, going on a school holiday abroad for the first time, leaving school and my mother taking me away from my Grandparents, who I loved, to go and live down South with her. She needed me because she was pregnant, even though she hadn't needed me before that. When I think about it, the list of changes goes on and on. So many changes in the nearly 63 years of my life and I am sure there are many, many more to come.
That's the thing about change. It always happens, it never really goes away. Some of us have more changes than others. Some changes happen to everyone, some are personal to us. Some of us have support during these times of change, while others have to cope with it on our own. And some of us will never, ever be the same after one particular change, whatever that might be, has come knocking at our door. Once the change is there and is happening, most of the time we have no choice but to surrender to the flow and let it happen. Sometimes there is just nothing we can do about it.
When my mother took me down South to live away from Yorkshire I was only 16 years old and had no choice in the matter. I didn't want to go, but I was under age and there was nothing I could do about it. When she tried to move me again a few years later I was older and more able to assert myself and didn't go with them. However, I believe that life has a way of putting you just where you need to be. If I had never left Yorkshire when I was 16 I would never have been to the places I've been to, met the people I've met, had the life experiences that I have had, and have the memories I have today.
So, sometimes change, no matter how hard, can work out to be a good thing. That was change I had no control over, but there has also been many, many times I have had the choice whether to change or not, and whether to maintain that change. Now, I bet you are thinking “She is coming around to talk about weight loss and management again”, and I will (after all, that is what my blog's about), but... first of all I was going to talk about another time, back when I was in an abusive marriage. At that time I was so busy just surviving. Trying to look after everybody, the children, my grandmother and even my husband, I took my wedding vows very seriously indeed, and I knew he had some serious problems and I did my very best to try to help him, but he wasn't able to help himself, and we had no support really, so in the end there had to be a change, both for my sanity and the safety of the children and myself. If I was to write about all that happened in those final days it would sound like if it was coming straight from the pages of some novel, or maybe a TV soap opera, certainly not real life! But, as they say, truth is stranger than fiction and perhaps someday I will write about it, but at the moment my blog is still about weight loss. Now, I say at the moment because I feel some changes coming on. I am just not quite sure what they are at the moment. This is my 100th post in my blog. Who would have known that when I decided to start writing again last year that I would have really got this far, in more ways than one. I started writing this blog, the first time, way back in 2014, because I wanted to document my weight loss and I wanted my grandson, and also now my granddaughter, to know what I was doing. I blogged for a short while, and then stopped, and then started again last year, and really it has changed with the way I have really started to look differently at the best way of having a sustainable way of eating whilst also losing weight and now hopefully keeping it off.
So here we are, as I said, at blog number 100, but I have no idea as of yet if I have reached my goal of losing 100 lbs, because I decided I would only get weighed at the end of the month. I am at a time of change. Yes, there's that six letter word again, but I will greet it head on and I know how I am going to deal with it. It doesn't scare me at all. Well, at least not as far as my writing is concerned. For now that will carry on. All throughout this last year of strange times, my writing has been the one constant in my life, and the one thing that will be here for many years to come. The thing to look back on when my grandchildren are old enough to read it, should they want to know just what their Nannan got up to! :-)
My writing may change in the months to come. I am not sure what road it will go down, but what I am sure about is that it will be varied and hopefully interesting and I will not worry if something changes at the last minute. Life is an adventure, so enjoy it and make the most of it!
Until next time,
Love, Jackie
xxx
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